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October 15, 2000

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"What WERE They Thinking?" II: The Wrath of Hollywod

Another edition of the greatest mistakes in show biz.
Selection Source Performer(s) Comments
Michelle Golden Throats IV (1997) Xaviera Hollander Best known as the author of The Happy Hooker. This is from her 1973 LP Xaviera! Are those real multiple orgasms or is she faking?
It’s All the Same Man of La Mancha (OS 1972) Sophia Loren Somewhat miscast, Loren does her best to hide the fact that she can’t sing for beans. At least it’s in keeping with the rest of the film, which Leonard Maltin rates as "BOMB" and describes as "plodding" and "abysmal".
Wind-Up Toy Hollywood Hi-Fi (1996) Jerry Mathers The Beaver’s in trouble this time! This stinker was recorded in 1962. The next year the show was cancelled. Coincidence?
59th St. Bridge Song Hollywood Hi-Fi (1996) Danny Bonaduce Despite being a member of the singing Partridge Family, Bonaduce never actually sang on any of their recordings (along with the rest of the kids; only David Cassidy and Shirley Jones sang with their own voices) and now we know why. This was released in 1973. The show was cancelled in 1974. We sense a pattern here!
What’s This Generation Coming To Hollywood Hi-Fi (1996) Robert Mitchum Mitchum decided he was a calypso singer while filming in Trinidad and decided to cash in on the Harry Belafonte-inspired calypso craze with his 1957 LP Calypso...Is Like So, from which this comes.
Tele-Vee-Shun The Best of Stan Freeburg Stan Freeburg OK, this doesn’t count because it’s a deliberate parody of calypso, but we can’t pass up a good segue.
John Shaft Golden Throats II (1991) Sammy Davis, Jr. Recorded in 1969 for Barry Gordy at Motown, in the mistaken belief that Mr. Show Business would be credible as a soul singer. Davis’ first LP for Motown went straight into the toilet, so the rest of the material he recorded (including this) was shelved. Davis bought the rights to it and released it in 1972 on the MGM LP Sammy Davis Jr. Now! - which also flopped.
Hey, Jude Golden Throats II (1991) Bing Crosby From the 1969 LP Hey Jude/Hey Bing!, which also boasts performances of "Little Green Apples" and "Mr. Bojangles".
Give Peace a Chance Golden Throats II (1991) Mitch Miller This comes under the "they meant well" category. Mitch chants Lennon's original rant while the boys give peace a chance.

Acronyms and other mysteries defined:

OC: Unless otherwise indicated, the Original Cast recording of a Broadway show, along with the date.

OS: Unless otherwise indicated, the Original Soundtrack recording of a film, TV show, etc.

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